So I was thinking...

I was listening to an interview on the C.B.C yesterday with David Gilmour. He won the Governor General's this year for his book, "A Perfect Night to Go to China". During the interview he was talking about discovering his "one great love". He said that he had always thought that it would be a woman. He mentioned that he has been married "here and there" and made no bones about his sexual misconduct and selfishness in his marriages. He is now happily married to a woman he adores, but says that at 55, he realizes that his one great love is for his son.

So, this is what got me to thinking. I wonder if all of our "one great loves", if we have them at all, are for the people we are able to love the most, without expecting a return on that love. I wonder if that is really what love is about (I don't mean relationships when I say love here). I wonder if our own needs and desires and emptinesses take us away from the ability to often find our true love in a man or a woman but easier to find in a child because we can love them less selfishly. Children do not fill in the empty spaces of self-esteem, companionship, intimacy. They take all that they can, and when they do give, it is by accident, unintentional, flowing out of their selfish little hearts, to a waiting parent that loves them regardless.

So, this in turn got me to thinking about God, about the nature of her love for her children. Is God's love for me so pure because there is nothing I can give her? No empty spaces she is hoping I will fill? She is complete in herself and so completely free to love me? That this is why my blundered up acts of love for her are graciously accepted, even in their selfishness?

Just thinking. Just wondering.